Privacy In The Public Eye

 - Published in Ceylon Today, Monday 15th July 2018 -

Niccolo Machiavelli, several centuries ago,  said to a Medici prince: ‘Everyone sees what you appear to be, few experience what you really are’. This statement is surely even more true in this publicity-hungry era, characterized by internet fame and public relations exercises. 

Influencers, authorities and public figures these days are so conscious of the way their life is presented to their growing public that they often modify it to represent a version of themselves that may at times be very different from the reality. As their movie launches, or their book ‘drops’, or their event goes viral, they are required to promote it, using themselves and the image they present. But Insta-appeal is not the most satisfying of lifestyles to generate, and every one of these public figures has a personal life. The public’s interest, or ‘right to know’, is often used as a justification for speculation and intrusion on these individuals, but this is not a given right:  the actress Emma Thompson once fiercely denied that the public are really interested, accusing an Australian reporter of trying to aggressively generate that interest, by rudely breaching her right to privacy in an interview, to trigger her response and increase ratings for his TV show. 

The tension between our private and public lives is one which everyone navigates, and it can be a volatile one. In an era of data mining, identity fraud and computer hacking, in which details of the FAQs of our lives are demanded in exchange for access to services we desire, it is both difficult and necessary to be vigilant about what and how we share ourselves and aspects of our image. 

People have become more self-conscious as a result of the worldwide selfie phenomenon - and even the most avid Instagram influencer must tire at times of the effort needed to constantly update the visual story their pics and captions portrays. Some people routinely reveal far too much to their online ‘family’ - details of their current location, the digital codes of their airline tickets, the faces and ages of their children, the status of their intimate relationships, and even their home address, locatable via GoogleEarth. In an effort to connect or show off, they compromise their privacy and that of their loved ones. 

To not lose our sense of self, I suggest that the connection between our public persona and our private self could be more intentionally and effectively managed, with a sense of boundary operating at all times to preserve our safety and dignity - at the same time as we offer insight into our thoughts and feelings to the outside world. Amidst the sneak peeks and the slow reveals, there is our actual and ongoing life, which requires privacy, and time to ourselves. 

People in real life are not robots, and we lapse, and blur these boundaries ourselves all the time. And these lapses often make us more appealing. In fact, via Instagram and Twitter, celebrities and public figures and their media personnel can share images from their personal lives with their fans in ways which make us feel like we ‘know’ them. They can see our texts and reply to our tweets if they wish. And sometimes the insights they give via their personalized posts on public platforms are very personal, and revealing. Celebrity couples share glimpses of their meals together, and behind-the-scenes preparations for public celebrations, and normalize themselves to the public by sharing family pictures and stories of their personal failures and disappointments. 

We get invited into their homes, via TV crews, we can see J.K. Rowling making a chocolate cake in her kitchen for her child’s birthday party, or crying when she visits the apartment she was living in when she wrote the first Harry Potter book, and her life seemed then as if it was ‘at rock bottom... which became the foundation on which she built her life’. The sincerity of her comments on this, in her public Commencement Address at Harvard are seen more vividly, in the light of this personal revelation. 

Oprah Winfrey built her media career interviewing people on living room chairs and couches in front of a studio audience, and now conducts philosophical and spiritual discussions on chairs set under trees in the gardens of her home. The phrase ‘opens up’ is used frequently in promotions for these interviews, to advertise that revealing information is exclusively conveyed in the conversation between two apparent friends, which we can witness and in which we participate through the alluring facsimile of intimacy created by technology. 

Entrepreneurs, leaders and proactive people who actively shape their own careers are very aware of this significant discrepancy. A Resume or CV only lists an individual’s achievements and accolades. A brilliant diagram I recently saw showed the difference between the surface success and the sacrifices, frustrations and hard work beneath, in the form of an ice berg. 

Visible on the top of the image is 1/10th of the mass of the iceberg, above the surface of the water and in the open air. Degree certificates, trophies, medals and awards are seen here. In the cross-section presented in the image we then see the 9/10ths of the mass under the surface: the rejections, the sleepless nights, the tears, the expenses, the disappointments, the challenges and stresses of meeting targets and managing expectations. We see also the priorities which must be given to staying healthy, to the formation of good habits and a growth mindset, of persistence and focus, of daily goals and determination, of the need to manage our time, money and energy. 



In fact, a person can generate interest in their efforts by lifting the curtain on their lives, and showing the backstory of the glittering public image they present. They can show the hard work, and the doubts and fears they had to overcome. They add to their brand by doing so, and to some extent show themselves as deserving the recognition they are given. They speak of their gratitude, and the opportunities they have been given, but they also show how hard they have worked to generate their own success. This to some extent creates protection from the negative effects of jealousy and envy from their fan base as well as those who do not wish them well. 

Beyoncé for example, in her recent documentary ‘Life Is But A Dream’, spoke of the sadness of her miscarriages, and some of the issues she had to deal with in her family and in the African American community which at times has regarded her huge success, and great talent and beauty, with mixed feelings, through the filter of their own less-than-wonderful experiences. 

People in this era created the paradoxical form of communication known as the ‘humblebrag’: where a person wishes to draw attention to their achievements but at the same time does not wish to seem arrogant or boastful. So they say ‘I am humbled and honoured to be given this award/tribute/recognition’. They emphasize what a team effort it has been. They position themselves as part of a collective, and acknowledge the love and support of their partners and families. This is usually absolutely true, but also very strategic - because it diffuses the attention of the public, which can sometimes be as lethal as The Eye Of Sauron in its condemnation. 

The Hunger Games trilogy of books showcased this very well, showing the protagonist’s struggle to create and sustain an appealing public persona which could literally mean her survival in a world of televised sponsorship of a public event which was a contest of life and death, engineered as a political display. 

In Ancient Rome, the senators had a house in the country where they lived with their family, and a town house in the city, where they were available to fulfil their responsibilities in their professional life. Through technology, we are now available to everyone in both spheres 24/7, unless we separate the personal from the public in our own era. 

It is worth noting that those classical public figures often named their private homes names like ‘Mon Repos’ - ‘My Place Of Rest’. The public eye and the spotlight and centre stage is not actually where the real life happens, to real people. Unless we actually know them personally, we only see what they appear to be.